This introduction is for the folks who are here and are not a part of my Wednesday small group. We have started a series called Conversations with God and are trying to work through a 30 day challenge to improve our prayer lives with God. I thought of sharing my conversation with God each day throughout the 30 days, with you guys so it might be an encouragement in your lives. I thank God for the spiritual people mentoring and guiding me in my life. You guys know who you are and I thank you for the impact you made in my life. I hope to keep this short so it wouldn't take too much of your time if you decided to follow this post every day. With that said here is day 1.
DAY 1
As I read through Jeremiah 9:24 "But let him who glories glory in this, that he understands and knows me.." God pointed out that all the other things that we take pride in life are really only blessings that God has bestowed on us and not things that we attained through our own talent. The only thing that we have bragging rights for is knowing God, and yet we brag about so many other things that God has blessed us with while forgetting to mention the giver of all things..
And another passage that struck my attention is John 14:27 ".. Peace I give to you; not as the world gives do I give to you..". I always thought and prayed that God should first take away the thousand problems in my life to take away that anxiousness and worry. That way he will give me peace by taking away the reason to worry. But I realize God's way is different from ours or the worlds way. Through chaos and confusion and through difficult circumstances , when we cry to him , he gives us "Peace that surpasses all understanding.. " (Philippians 4:67). While the world is expecting us to freak out and collapse we might be confident and peaceful in knowing that God will ultimately save the day..
DAY 2
When I was reading Mathew 16:24-26 ".. For what profit is to a man if he gains the whole world, and loses his own soul? Or what will a man give in exchange for his soul? " God pointed out how I long to be more passionate about my career and about moving up in life and forget what is important in life, following him. When I think about the time when our journey on earth ends the only things that will matter is how we lived for God. And how we showed Christ to others. I think it will be kind of cool to see all the people who have helped us in our walk and all the people who we have helped to follow Christ when we finally reach home. That is a treasure that will come with us, nothing else.
Another thing God was convicting me about was I Samuel 12:23 "As for me, be it far from me that I should sin against the Lord in ceasing to pray for you. " Wow if just not to praying for someone is sinning then I cannot imagine how long I have been blissfully unaware of this and have kept living in sin. It just pointed out to me an area in my prayer I was really lacking at. The thing I figured is the closer I draw towards God the more he reveals on how I should be living.
DAY 3
Often I forget how big God is. I make him too small and start to think of him more like a human being and being limited in what he can do for me. I generally forget that everything about Christianity and faith is supernatural. When I read Romans 8:31-25 ".. He who did not spare His own Son. but delivered him up for us all, how shall he not with Him also freely give us all things?" I was amazed as to how God revealed everything he has done for me and the biggest thing of all , how he gave his only son for me and if I was the only one who needed his forgiveness how he still would have done it for me. When I think about that strong love for me that God has shown towards me despite my weaknesses and shortcomings I think to myself even through all my mess God wouldn't leave me, he will still continue to provide for me and give with an everlasting love.
DAY 4
Today while I was praying for God to continually work in me, I was thinking about how I don't feel the same enthusiasm and passion to seek him everyday. God turned me to read Ephesians 3:14-20 "..He would grant me, according to the riches of His glory, to be strengthened with might through his Spirit in the inner man..." And He helped me realize that I cannot do it on my own and I need not do it on my own. God reminded me his promise that he made before he left this earth as to how he would send his Holy Spirit to help us and guide us. And as I kept reading the passage of scripture which said ".. Strengthened in the spirit..that I may be able to comprehend with all the saints what is the width and length and depth and height - to know the love of Christ which passes knowledge.." I began to pray for God to fill me with his Holy Spirit that I may be able to fully comprehend his love and fully worship him in spirit so that there will be an unquenching passion to seek him.
DAY 5
Often when I think about inviting new people to church or talking to an unbeliever about Christ I feel like I am not knowledgeable enough or eloquent enough to have any positive impact in my conversation. And whenever I ask God for wisdom I think in terms of earthly wisdom and how it should leave the other person with no reason to protest or with no way to come up with a good comeback. But today while I was praying and reading the scripture I realized that God doesn't want that and while I probably might win the argument in doing so, I will loose the person and fail to attract him to Christ. Through today's scripture reading , James 3:17 "But the wisdom that is from above is first pure, then peaceable, then gentle, willing to yield, full of mercy and good fruits, without partiality and without hypocrisy.." God made me realize that it is not about me and that "foolishness of God is wiser than my wisdom" (I Corinthians 1:25) but when God grants his wisdom I will be able to project him more and humble myself in my conversation with people.
DAY 6
Today while I pondering upon the words of Paul in I Timothy 1:14-15 " .. Christ came into the world to save sinners , of whom I am chief.." I was thinking to myself if Paul could say he is the chief of sinners, where does that leave me? I realize we all have a long way to go before we can at least have a glimpse of what following the Lord looks like. But while we are still sinners Christ died for us, so that through his Son we can be partakers of his righteousness. It is quite an awesome privilege to know " He chose us in Him before the foundation of the world, that we should be holy and without blame before Him in love, having predestined us to adoption as sons by Jesus Christ, to himself." (Ephesians 1:3-6) And that we have a share in all the power and all the inheritance just like his son Jesus. It amazes me of how God gave us a privilege even not granted to angels despite of how we treat him in our lives. This is true love.
DAY 7
I was kind of in a physically and emotionally drained out state in my life. I was tired of sitting at a desk all day and looking out my window, I was regretting not enjoying this great weather outside and not having time to myself to soak up the sun and to sit and read, think , laugh , relax and enjoy life. I was reading Revelation 2:4-5 "Nevertheless I have this against you, that you have left your first love" which made me wonder, when was the last time I did something for the first time in my life? It got me thinking about relationships and first love and how everything around you just felt like summer season. Bright, colorful, exciting and every little thing you did with them felt so special and no matter how many relationships you go through after that it's never going to feel like that first love. And sorrow gripped my heart when I though of how I forgot to put God in that place. I have forgotten to be excited about my relationship with him. I have forgotten to treasure every moment in his presence and how I take him for granted. It got me praying with a deep conviction and asking God to bring me back to my first love , my relationship with the living the Saviour.
DAY 8
Today I was really reluctant to come and spend time in prayer. I had a long hard day and it's Friday evening so I wanted to relax, play my guitar which I have been itching to get my hands on for days. But when I thought of priorities I forced myself to sit and pray. The first ten minutes passed with me thinking something else not really concentrating when I was reading the scripture, but just reading to get through it quickly. When I reached the next passage something in it just hit home. I was reading through Isaiah 53:5-6 "But he was wounded for our transgressions, He was bruised for our iniquities; the chastisement for our peace was upon Him, and by His stripes we are healed." I have read this scripture several times before but never really understood it from the perspective that God made me to look at Just think about this for a second, he was chastised for our sins so that we can have peace, while he suffered for what we have done. Does any part of this sound fair to you? Absolutely not. Nevertheless that's how much he loves us. He didn't want to see us suffer, so he took the punishment and was disgraced and humiliated for our sake, while we still live in sin and act like its his responsibility. Salvation through Christ is free but by no means cheap. There was a heavy price paid to save even a worthless sinner like me . How much more should we be thankful and how much more should we be grateful and diligent in seeking him, not taking God's things lightly and not making him too small in our lives by taking his grace for granted ?
DAY 9
Today as I read through the bible passages for today's reading I was looking for something through which God would talk to me when I prayed. I was familiar with most of the passages for today's readings and was not particularly moved by any one of them . Then when I read Psalm 62:1,5-6 "Truly my soul waits silently for God; from Him comes my salvation... My soul, wait silently for God alone, for my expectation is from Him. He only is my rock and my salvation" I realized the importance of silent time in prayer. I wasn't overwhelmed by the burden of seeking something, but just sitting there trying to meditate on his word and trying to take it in was a great experience. It is like sitting with a friend even if you don't talk too much or have a good conversation with them its just nice to know they are with you. How wonderful would it be be if we just realize that he is with us and we are in his presence and nothing else matters or bothers us because of the confidence we have in Him that he is able to understand and handle all our problems if only we can just spend time with him.
DAY 10
As I started praying today there were so many things that were bothering me and bringing me down. I was kind of disappointed that I still deal with certain temptations and weaknesses in life and that affects my confidence and my walk with God. I sometimes feel like a hypocrite , trying to put up a front when I am with people and feel like I'm not really the Godly person I project myself to be. This makes me step back a little bit and do less for God thinking that I am not simply worthy of certain positions of responsibility, or I am not worthy of telling other people and encouraging other people in their walk with Christ while I myself am struggling. But when I was reading I John 1:9 "If we confess our sins, He is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness " I was really encouraged by it. God made me realize that through my struggles , he is a faithful God and he is faithful to forgive me though I fall and get up from time to time, he is faithful to forgive when I come into his presence. And God's promise is to cleanse me from "all unrighteousness" , not some , not just small things or big, but all unrighteousness. So there is nothing too big that God cannot understand and no sin too great for him to not forgive through his grace. As I kept reading 1 Corinthians 10:13 "No temptation has overtaken you expect such is common to man; but God is faithful, who will not allow you to be tempted beyond what you are able, but with the temptation will also make the way of escape, that you may be able to bear it" I understood that there is no reason for me to think there is no other way but to yield to temptation in a certain situation, because God in his mercy always makes a way of escape, and it is upon us to choose it and be wise. I love the fact that these are not just words, but how Christ set an example for us. Because Jesus being man was tempted in all the same things but yet came out sinless, which tells me it is not impossible , if Christ can do it , we through his grace and being co-heirs with Christ can also do it.
DAY 11
The main focus of today's conversation with God is joy. How often I forget to be joyful and how infectious it is. It is hard for me to be joyful when there is tons of stuff waiting for me at work. There are so many things that need my attention and there is always a worry about making ends meet. So do we expect God to take away all of that so we may be full of Joy? Certainly not. I believe that if everything in life is going exactly as I planned, without any hurdles or without any problems I would not really follow God with all my heart I would think I was self sufficient and have no need for God in my life. When I look back at my life , the times I have really been in great struggles are the times when I drew really close to God. I think the key to living with Joy is to "abide in him and let his word abide in us and when we ask what we desire, it shall be done for us " (John 15:7). May be not right then , but we can be sure that if " we abide in him, commit our ways to him and trust him, he shall bring it to pass " (Psalm 37:5). I believe when I give my burdens to the Lord and when I know I cannot do it by myself, in my weakness he is strong and he will come and save the day. Thats a huge burden off my back. And once I bear no burden myself there is nothing to worry about but be joyful in him.
DAY 12
Today's topic was peace which got me thinking about the things that destroy Gods peace in my life. Every single time I kept coming back to my thoughts, its not so much what other people do or what I do that destroys my peace but most of the time its my thoughts. Like Paul said in Roman 12:2 "And be not conformed to this world: but be you transformed by the renewing of your mind, that you may prove what is that good, and acceptable, and perfect, will of God." But how are we supposed to renew our minds? I believe Philippians 4:8-9 has the answer "Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things. Whatever you have learned or received or heard from me, or seen in me—put it into practice. And the God of peace will be with you. " It's only by replacing our thoughts by God's thoughts that we can attain true peace in our lives.
DAY 13
Today I was kind of trying to skim through the scriptures and end my prayer session soon, because I was really tired mentally more than physically from all the work in the day. But I had to stop and think about this scripture Philippians 2:5-11 "5 Let this mind be in you which was also in Christ Jesus, 6 who, being in the form of God, did not consider it robbery to be equal with God, 7 but made Himself of no reputation, taking the form of a bond servant, and coming in the likeness of men. 8 And being found in appearance as a man, He humbled Himself and became obedient to the point of death, even the death of the cross. 9Therefore God also has highly exalted Him and given Him the name which is above every name, 10that at the name of Jesus every knee should bow, of those in heaven, and of those on earth, and of those under the earth, 11 and that every tongue should confess that Jesus Christ is Lord, to the glory of God the Father." I am so amazed by this, no matter how many times I read it. How God being the God of the universe would humble himself enough to be humiliated and beaten by the people he created and how he died on a cross which was the most humiliating kind f death during that day. Could he not have chosen another way? Surely he could have , but the kind of example that he set before us with his actions is just so amazing. When I think of myself and how insignificant my life in the light of his sacrifice I am ashamed of how much I take pride in myself and how much I boast. If I cannot not remember anything from my prayer tonight, the only thing I want to remember is asking God to teach me to be humble and follow at least in a little way the example he set in front of me.
DAY 14
There are times in life that we should take a stand in some things. There were sins in my life that I was confessing to God which I found myself to be ding repetitively. I was trying to ask God to change me, but never really put any effort by myself to be obedient to that change. Consider a road filled with pot holes. If I wanted to save my car from driving that bad should probably avoid the road. Just praying about it and still driving on the same road wouldn't help. The same way my decisions needed some action on my part. Especially my thought pattern had to change. Meditating on the same things would conspire the same actions. Today God was talking to me through Romans 12:2 which was the gist of my prayer today. "I will not be conformed to the world, but I will be transformed by the renewing of my mind, that I may prove what is good and acceptable and perfect will of God."
DAY 15
Today while I was reading the verse Romans 6:14 "For sin shall not have dominion over you, for you are not under law but under grace" it got me thinking about the provision Christ has made for us. What if Christ did not die for me on the cross would I have kept the law , would I be able to live life as freely and joyfully. Certainly not. The freedom we enjoy, the privilege of calling on him every time we mess up, the hope of him delivering us from our troubles and the confidence of leaning on him whenever we are in trouble is precious. We sometimes forget the magnanimity of having Christ in our lives. How small I make him in my life and how much I take for granted his assurance of salvation deeply convicts me. We are really a blessed generation to live in this age where we have been given that privilege of knowing Christ as our Saviour and living under grace and not bound by the law.
DAY 16
Today's theme for day 16 was the Holy spirit. How often I tend to neglect the presence of God's Holy spirit in me. Often I try to look for answers on how to pray or how to seek him while neglecting the help that he sent us when he left this earth. Often praying for God's spirit in my life is a cliche and I do not realize the Holy spirit is a person who dwells in us. I think we will be more conscious on the way we conduct ourselves if we live with the understanding that the Holy spirit of God dwells in us. When I read Galatians 4:6-7 "And because you are sons, God has sent forth the Spirit of His Son into your hearts, crying out "Abba father!" Therefore you are no longer a slave but a son, and if a son, then an heir of God through Christ" I was thinking about the awesome privilege we have to call him Father because of what Christ has done for us. Because of him we are co heirs with Christ. Can you imagine being considered equal to Jesus because of what he has done for us? It just amazes me to think of how Christ did not hold anything back from us. We being the sinful people that we are he wanted us to be considered equal to him through his death and resurrection. I thank god for his Holy spirit and the love that he is showering upon our lives every single day.
DAY 18
The thing that I realize on a regular basis is that there is power in praise. Today I was reading through Psalm 23 " 1 The LORD is my shepherd;
I shall not want.
2 He makes me to lie down in green pastures;
He leads me beside the still waters.
3 He restores my soul;
He leads me in the paths of righteousness
For His name’s sake.
4 Yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death,
I will fear no evil;
For You are with me;
Your rod and Your staff, they comfort me.
5 You prepare a table before me in the presence of my enemies;
You anoint my head with oil;
My cup runs over.
6 Surely goodness and mercy shall follow me
All the days of my life;
And I will dwell[a] in the house of the LORD
Forever."
When I closed my eyes and thought about how true it has been in my life and just praised God for being such a wonderful and faithful God to me I just felt his presence in a strong way. When I count his blessings in my life nothing lying in front of me intimidates me anymore , God was able to do amazing things in my life and he is still able to provide no matter what the situation is.
DAY 19
Today I was wondering whether God really hears my prayer. I sometimes manage to live exactly opposite of how he desires me to live. I wondered if God would still be faithful to an unfaithful person like me . When I was reading 2 Corinthians 5:21 "He made Him who knew no sin to be sin for me, that I may become the righteousness of God" God made me realize how all his ways and thoughts are opposite to the world's ways. Like Jesus said, the least shall be the greatest, the humble shall inherit his kingdom, likewise he made a provision for sinners like us to be declared righteous through his son. So I realize its not about me , but about him , its not by my works but by his grace that God hears my prayers and answers me.
DAY 20
Today in our group prayer time we were looking at Acts 9:17-18 "17 pAnd Ananias went his way and entered the house; and qlaying his hands on him he said, “Brother Saul, the Lord 4Jesus, who appeared to you on the road as you came, has sent me that you may receive your sight and rbe filled with the Holy Spirit.” 18Immediately there fell from his eyes something like scales, and he received his sight at once; and he arose and was baptized." I started thinking about Saul's life before getting converted and his life after. I notice how there was a 180degree change in his ways and how, from being really zealous about punishing Christians , he turned into a really zealous Christian. When I think about my life, I have known the truth of Christ for ages but still haven't let go of some of my old habits. My prayer to God was to transform my life completely from loving the world to loving things of God.
DAY 21
Today the verse that really stuck to me when I was praying was Psalm 145:8-9 "The Lord is gracious and full of compassion, slow to anger and great in mercy. The Lord is good to all, and His tender mercies are over all His works" How true that has been in my life. Despite of my reckless lifestyle the Lord has been so good to me. He is really slow to anger and longsuffering. When I compare Gods character to ours there is such a difference. When we love someone as much as God loves us, what would be our reaction if they are unfaithful and disobedient to us? Yet God is his infinite mercy graciously picks me up every time I fall and gives me a clean slate to try again.
DAY 22
Today being Good Friday I was meditating on God's sacrifice for us on the cross then I came across this verse from Micah "He has shown me what is good; and what does the Lord require of me but to do justly, to love mercy, and to walk humbly with my God (Micah 6:8)" How true it is, God gave his life for us on the cross and expects nothing in return. We don't have to earn salvation we don't have to do anything in return , the only things he expects of us is to walk humbly with Him. It makes me praise Him when I think about how free his sacrifice has set me.
DAY 23
I was reading through Isaiah 64:8 "But now, O Lord , You are our Father; we are the clay, and You are our potter; and all we are the work of Your hand" and it really inspired me. It is such a burden lifted off my shoulders when I commit my ways to him. When we make our own decisions in life it is always a risk, for we cannot speculate the outcome. But if we let him have his will in our lives , when know we can never go wrong. So "I commit my way to the Lord, and trust also in Him, and He shall bring it to pass.... I rest in the Lord and wait patiently for Him (Psalm 37:5,7)"
DAY 24
Today I was reading Mathew 5:3-10 "
3 Blessed are the poor in spirit, For theirs is the kingdom of heaven.
4 Blessed are those who mourn,
For they shall be comforted.
5 Blessed are the meek,
For they shall inherit the earth.
6 Blessed are those who hunger and thirst for righteousness,
For they shall be filled.
7 Blessed are the merciful,
For they shall obtain mercy.
8 Blessed are the pure in heart,
For they shall see God.
9 Blessed are the peacemakers,
For they shall be called sons of God.
10 Blessed are those who are persecuted for righteousness’ sake,
For theirs is the kingdom of heaven. "
And the challenge was to ask God to show which of these attitudes I need the most. And God was convicting me of the verse "6 Blessed are those who hunger and thirst for righteousness, For they shall be filled. " and I was thinking how often I struggle with that fact. What a blessed attitude that will be, to hunger and thirst after righteousness. For God demands us to be holy like he is holy and to love righteousness and to hate evil. So today I pray for God to give me a zealous passion and love for seeking righteousness in my life.
DAY 25
I was reading Roman 5:6-8 as a part of my scripture study today and how true it is . "For when we were still without strength, in due time Christ died for the ungodly. For scarcely for a righteous man will one die; yet perhaps for a good man someone would even dare to die. But God demonstrated his own love towards us, in that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us." It sometimes makes me wonder why God even cares about someone like me or why he chose to reveal his truth to a sinner like me. But his ways are greater than my ways and his thoughts much greater than mine. So only thing I have to do is thank him for his amazing love. What a blessed privilege towards an undeserving person like me.
DAY 26
Today I was kind of concerned about my job situation and job trials and other worries when I started to pray and I could not really think or pray about much else. Then I read Luke 10:41-42 "You are worried and troubled about many things. But one thing is needed .. " Through this God convicted me to seek him first in my life and he will take care of the rest. It is important for us to seek God and think about higher things than the mundane things in our lives. If my relationship with God is right, he being my heavenly father will provide for all my needs. Mathew 6:33-34 "I will seek first the kingdom of God.. I will not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about its own things. Sufficient for the day is its own trouble."
DAY 27
As I was praying with my small group today God turned my attention to a passage we were reading in
Deuteronomy 6 " Now this is the commandment,and these are the statutes and judgments which the LORD your God has commanded to teach you, that you may observe them in the land which you are crossing over to possess, 2 that you may fear the LORD your God, to keep all His statutes and His commandments which I command you, you and your son and your grandson, all the days of your life, and that your days may be prolonged. 3Therefore hear, O Israel, and be careful to observe it, that it may be well with you, and that you may multiply greatly as the LORD God of your fathers has promised you—‘a land flowing with milk and honey.’4 “Hear, O Israel: The LORD our God, the LORD is one! 5 You shall love the LORD your God with all your heart, with all your soul, and with all your strength. "
I always skimmed through the passage and never really understood what God meant by loving Him with all my heart. There are so many relationships in life I pursue with so many people and stop me from pursuing God or that take God's place in my life. God revealed to me that loving God with all my just doesn't mean putting him first in my life it also means not holding back things in my heart that go against his will and to not continue pursuing relationships that do not help me to draw closer to God but in fact will draw me away from him. I believe as Christians we have to guard our hearts or we will easily get deterred into longing after things that eventually will draw us away from God. The enemy is always at work trying to put something in our lives that will just keep us occupied otherwise, like relationships, jobs, money, sports and other passions.
DAY 28
When I think about God's goodness in my life I wonder how I would've done without him in some situations. Yet when I am really put under stress to make a decision quick, or when I am really anxious about something I never think about God's will in the matter, but tend to do my own thing which often results in a train wreck. When I read John 15:5 today "You are the vine, I am the branch. Apart from You I can do nothing " I thought how true it was in my life. My life's story would have been so completely different if it weren't for God's intervention in my life. I pray that God will teach me more to rely on him for every single thing in life and know what his Holy spirit in prompting me to do.
DAY 30
How often I forget to be humble and seek God with diligence. Usually my attitude towards prayer is that God should listen and forgive me ,its his responsibility, but I seldom do anything to seek him earnestly.
Psalm 25:4-9 " 4 Show me Your ways, O LORD;
Teach me Your paths.
5 Lead me in Your truth and teach me,
For You are the God of my salvation;
On You I wait all the day.
6 Remember, O LORD, Your tender mercies and Your loving kindnesses,
For they are from of old.
7 Do not remember the sins of my youth, nor my transgressions;
According to Your mercy remember me,
For Your goodness’ sake, O LORD.
8 Good and upright is the LORD;
Therefore He teaches sinners in the way.
9 The humble He guides in justice,
And the humble He teaches His way."
I realized that there is power in waiting in the Lord's presence, for the bible says "He who waits on the Lord shall mount up on wings like eagles." And there is power in humility. Like in Luke 18:13 " And the tax collector, standing afar off, would not so much as raise his eyes to heaven, but beat his breast, saying, ‘God, be merciful to me a sinner!’" God hears and answers prayers of the humble.
DAY 1
As I read through Jeremiah 9:24 "But let him who glories glory in this, that he understands and knows me.." God pointed out that all the other things that we take pride in life are really only blessings that God has bestowed on us and not things that we attained through our own talent. The only thing that we have bragging rights for is knowing God, and yet we brag about so many other things that God has blessed us with while forgetting to mention the giver of all things..
And another passage that struck my attention is John 14:27 ".. Peace I give to you; not as the world gives do I give to you..". I always thought and prayed that God should first take away the thousand problems in my life to take away that anxiousness and worry. That way he will give me peace by taking away the reason to worry. But I realize God's way is different from ours or the worlds way. Through chaos and confusion and through difficult circumstances , when we cry to him , he gives us "Peace that surpasses all understanding.. " (Philippians 4:67). While the world is expecting us to freak out and collapse we might be confident and peaceful in knowing that God will ultimately save the day..
DAY 2
When I was reading Mathew 16:24-26 ".. For what profit is to a man if he gains the whole world, and loses his own soul? Or what will a man give in exchange for his soul? " God pointed out how I long to be more passionate about my career and about moving up in life and forget what is important in life, following him. When I think about the time when our journey on earth ends the only things that will matter is how we lived for God. And how we showed Christ to others. I think it will be kind of cool to see all the people who have helped us in our walk and all the people who we have helped to follow Christ when we finally reach home. That is a treasure that will come with us, nothing else.
Another thing God was convicting me about was I Samuel 12:23 "As for me, be it far from me that I should sin against the Lord in ceasing to pray for you. " Wow if just not to praying for someone is sinning then I cannot imagine how long I have been blissfully unaware of this and have kept living in sin. It just pointed out to me an area in my prayer I was really lacking at. The thing I figured is the closer I draw towards God the more he reveals on how I should be living.
DAY 3
Often I forget how big God is. I make him too small and start to think of him more like a human being and being limited in what he can do for me. I generally forget that everything about Christianity and faith is supernatural. When I read Romans 8:31-25 ".. He who did not spare His own Son. but delivered him up for us all, how shall he not with Him also freely give us all things?" I was amazed as to how God revealed everything he has done for me and the biggest thing of all , how he gave his only son for me and if I was the only one who needed his forgiveness how he still would have done it for me. When I think about that strong love for me that God has shown towards me despite my weaknesses and shortcomings I think to myself even through all my mess God wouldn't leave me, he will still continue to provide for me and give with an everlasting love.
DAY 4
Today while I was praying for God to continually work in me, I was thinking about how I don't feel the same enthusiasm and passion to seek him everyday. God turned me to read Ephesians 3:14-20 "..He would grant me, according to the riches of His glory, to be strengthened with might through his Spirit in the inner man..." And He helped me realize that I cannot do it on my own and I need not do it on my own. God reminded me his promise that he made before he left this earth as to how he would send his Holy Spirit to help us and guide us. And as I kept reading the passage of scripture which said ".. Strengthened in the spirit..that I may be able to comprehend with all the saints what is the width and length and depth and height - to know the love of Christ which passes knowledge.." I began to pray for God to fill me with his Holy Spirit that I may be able to fully comprehend his love and fully worship him in spirit so that there will be an unquenching passion to seek him.
DAY 5
Often when I think about inviting new people to church or talking to an unbeliever about Christ I feel like I am not knowledgeable enough or eloquent enough to have any positive impact in my conversation. And whenever I ask God for wisdom I think in terms of earthly wisdom and how it should leave the other person with no reason to protest or with no way to come up with a good comeback. But today while I was praying and reading the scripture I realized that God doesn't want that and while I probably might win the argument in doing so, I will loose the person and fail to attract him to Christ. Through today's scripture reading , James 3:17 "But the wisdom that is from above is first pure, then peaceable, then gentle, willing to yield, full of mercy and good fruits, without partiality and without hypocrisy.." God made me realize that it is not about me and that "foolishness of God is wiser than my wisdom" (I Corinthians 1:25) but when God grants his wisdom I will be able to project him more and humble myself in my conversation with people.
DAY 6
Today while I pondering upon the words of Paul in I Timothy 1:14-15 " .. Christ came into the world to save sinners , of whom I am chief.." I was thinking to myself if Paul could say he is the chief of sinners, where does that leave me? I realize we all have a long way to go before we can at least have a glimpse of what following the Lord looks like. But while we are still sinners Christ died for us, so that through his Son we can be partakers of his righteousness. It is quite an awesome privilege to know " He chose us in Him before the foundation of the world, that we should be holy and without blame before Him in love, having predestined us to adoption as sons by Jesus Christ, to himself." (Ephesians 1:3-6) And that we have a share in all the power and all the inheritance just like his son Jesus. It amazes me of how God gave us a privilege even not granted to angels despite of how we treat him in our lives. This is true love.
DAY 7
I was kind of in a physically and emotionally drained out state in my life. I was tired of sitting at a desk all day and looking out my window, I was regretting not enjoying this great weather outside and not having time to myself to soak up the sun and to sit and read, think , laugh , relax and enjoy life. I was reading Revelation 2:4-5 "Nevertheless I have this against you, that you have left your first love" which made me wonder, when was the last time I did something for the first time in my life? It got me thinking about relationships and first love and how everything around you just felt like summer season. Bright, colorful, exciting and every little thing you did with them felt so special and no matter how many relationships you go through after that it's never going to feel like that first love. And sorrow gripped my heart when I though of how I forgot to put God in that place. I have forgotten to be excited about my relationship with him. I have forgotten to treasure every moment in his presence and how I take him for granted. It got me praying with a deep conviction and asking God to bring me back to my first love , my relationship with the living the Saviour.
DAY 8
Today I was really reluctant to come and spend time in prayer. I had a long hard day and it's Friday evening so I wanted to relax, play my guitar which I have been itching to get my hands on for days. But when I thought of priorities I forced myself to sit and pray. The first ten minutes passed with me thinking something else not really concentrating when I was reading the scripture, but just reading to get through it quickly. When I reached the next passage something in it just hit home. I was reading through Isaiah 53:5-6 "But he was wounded for our transgressions, He was bruised for our iniquities; the chastisement for our peace was upon Him, and by His stripes we are healed." I have read this scripture several times before but never really understood it from the perspective that God made me to look at Just think about this for a second, he was chastised for our sins so that we can have peace, while he suffered for what we have done. Does any part of this sound fair to you? Absolutely not. Nevertheless that's how much he loves us. He didn't want to see us suffer, so he took the punishment and was disgraced and humiliated for our sake, while we still live in sin and act like its his responsibility. Salvation through Christ is free but by no means cheap. There was a heavy price paid to save even a worthless sinner like me . How much more should we be thankful and how much more should we be grateful and diligent in seeking him, not taking God's things lightly and not making him too small in our lives by taking his grace for granted ?
DAY 9
Today as I read through the bible passages for today's reading I was looking for something through which God would talk to me when I prayed. I was familiar with most of the passages for today's readings and was not particularly moved by any one of them . Then when I read Psalm 62:1,5-6 "Truly my soul waits silently for God; from Him comes my salvation... My soul, wait silently for God alone, for my expectation is from Him. He only is my rock and my salvation" I realized the importance of silent time in prayer. I wasn't overwhelmed by the burden of seeking something, but just sitting there trying to meditate on his word and trying to take it in was a great experience. It is like sitting with a friend even if you don't talk too much or have a good conversation with them its just nice to know they are with you. How wonderful would it be be if we just realize that he is with us and we are in his presence and nothing else matters or bothers us because of the confidence we have in Him that he is able to understand and handle all our problems if only we can just spend time with him.
DAY 10
As I started praying today there were so many things that were bothering me and bringing me down. I was kind of disappointed that I still deal with certain temptations and weaknesses in life and that affects my confidence and my walk with God. I sometimes feel like a hypocrite , trying to put up a front when I am with people and feel like I'm not really the Godly person I project myself to be. This makes me step back a little bit and do less for God thinking that I am not simply worthy of certain positions of responsibility, or I am not worthy of telling other people and encouraging other people in their walk with Christ while I myself am struggling. But when I was reading I John 1:9 "If we confess our sins, He is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness " I was really encouraged by it. God made me realize that through my struggles , he is a faithful God and he is faithful to forgive me though I fall and get up from time to time, he is faithful to forgive when I come into his presence. And God's promise is to cleanse me from "all unrighteousness" , not some , not just small things or big, but all unrighteousness. So there is nothing too big that God cannot understand and no sin too great for him to not forgive through his grace. As I kept reading 1 Corinthians 10:13 "No temptation has overtaken you expect such is common to man; but God is faithful, who will not allow you to be tempted beyond what you are able, but with the temptation will also make the way of escape, that you may be able to bear it" I understood that there is no reason for me to think there is no other way but to yield to temptation in a certain situation, because God in his mercy always makes a way of escape, and it is upon us to choose it and be wise. I love the fact that these are not just words, but how Christ set an example for us. Because Jesus being man was tempted in all the same things but yet came out sinless, which tells me it is not impossible , if Christ can do it , we through his grace and being co-heirs with Christ can also do it.
DAY 11
The main focus of today's conversation with God is joy. How often I forget to be joyful and how infectious it is. It is hard for me to be joyful when there is tons of stuff waiting for me at work. There are so many things that need my attention and there is always a worry about making ends meet. So do we expect God to take away all of that so we may be full of Joy? Certainly not. I believe that if everything in life is going exactly as I planned, without any hurdles or without any problems I would not really follow God with all my heart I would think I was self sufficient and have no need for God in my life. When I look back at my life , the times I have really been in great struggles are the times when I drew really close to God. I think the key to living with Joy is to "abide in him and let his word abide in us and when we ask what we desire, it shall be done for us " (John 15:7). May be not right then , but we can be sure that if " we abide in him, commit our ways to him and trust him, he shall bring it to pass " (Psalm 37:5). I believe when I give my burdens to the Lord and when I know I cannot do it by myself, in my weakness he is strong and he will come and save the day. Thats a huge burden off my back. And once I bear no burden myself there is nothing to worry about but be joyful in him.
DAY 12
Today's topic was peace which got me thinking about the things that destroy Gods peace in my life. Every single time I kept coming back to my thoughts, its not so much what other people do or what I do that destroys my peace but most of the time its my thoughts. Like Paul said in Roman 12:2 "And be not conformed to this world: but be you transformed by the renewing of your mind, that you may prove what is that good, and acceptable, and perfect, will of God." But how are we supposed to renew our minds? I believe Philippians 4:8-9 has the answer "Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things. Whatever you have learned or received or heard from me, or seen in me—put it into practice. And the God of peace will be with you. " It's only by replacing our thoughts by God's thoughts that we can attain true peace in our lives.
DAY 13
Today I was kind of trying to skim through the scriptures and end my prayer session soon, because I was really tired mentally more than physically from all the work in the day. But I had to stop and think about this scripture Philippians 2:5-11 "5 Let this mind be in you which was also in Christ Jesus, 6 who, being in the form of God, did not consider it robbery to be equal with God, 7 but made Himself of no reputation, taking the form of a bond servant, and coming in the likeness of men. 8 And being found in appearance as a man, He humbled Himself and became obedient to the point of death, even the death of the cross. 9Therefore God also has highly exalted Him and given Him the name which is above every name, 10that at the name of Jesus every knee should bow, of those in heaven, and of those on earth, and of those under the earth, 11 and that every tongue should confess that Jesus Christ is Lord, to the glory of God the Father." I am so amazed by this, no matter how many times I read it. How God being the God of the universe would humble himself enough to be humiliated and beaten by the people he created and how he died on a cross which was the most humiliating kind f death during that day. Could he not have chosen another way? Surely he could have , but the kind of example that he set before us with his actions is just so amazing. When I think of myself and how insignificant my life in the light of his sacrifice I am ashamed of how much I take pride in myself and how much I boast. If I cannot not remember anything from my prayer tonight, the only thing I want to remember is asking God to teach me to be humble and follow at least in a little way the example he set in front of me.
DAY 14
There are times in life that we should take a stand in some things. There were sins in my life that I was confessing to God which I found myself to be ding repetitively. I was trying to ask God to change me, but never really put any effort by myself to be obedient to that change. Consider a road filled with pot holes. If I wanted to save my car from driving that bad should probably avoid the road. Just praying about it and still driving on the same road wouldn't help. The same way my decisions needed some action on my part. Especially my thought pattern had to change. Meditating on the same things would conspire the same actions. Today God was talking to me through Romans 12:2 which was the gist of my prayer today. "I will not be conformed to the world, but I will be transformed by the renewing of my mind, that I may prove what is good and acceptable and perfect will of God."
DAY 15
Today while I was reading the verse Romans 6:14 "For sin shall not have dominion over you, for you are not under law but under grace" it got me thinking about the provision Christ has made for us. What if Christ did not die for me on the cross would I have kept the law , would I be able to live life as freely and joyfully. Certainly not. The freedom we enjoy, the privilege of calling on him every time we mess up, the hope of him delivering us from our troubles and the confidence of leaning on him whenever we are in trouble is precious. We sometimes forget the magnanimity of having Christ in our lives. How small I make him in my life and how much I take for granted his assurance of salvation deeply convicts me. We are really a blessed generation to live in this age where we have been given that privilege of knowing Christ as our Saviour and living under grace and not bound by the law.
DAY 16
Today's theme for day 16 was the Holy spirit. How often I tend to neglect the presence of God's Holy spirit in me. Often I try to look for answers on how to pray or how to seek him while neglecting the help that he sent us when he left this earth. Often praying for God's spirit in my life is a cliche and I do not realize the Holy spirit is a person who dwells in us. I think we will be more conscious on the way we conduct ourselves if we live with the understanding that the Holy spirit of God dwells in us. When I read Galatians 4:6-7 "And because you are sons, God has sent forth the Spirit of His Son into your hearts, crying out "Abba father!" Therefore you are no longer a slave but a son, and if a son, then an heir of God through Christ" I was thinking about the awesome privilege we have to call him Father because of what Christ has done for us. Because of him we are co heirs with Christ. Can you imagine being considered equal to Jesus because of what he has done for us? It just amazes me to think of how Christ did not hold anything back from us. We being the sinful people that we are he wanted us to be considered equal to him through his death and resurrection. I thank god for his Holy spirit and the love that he is showering upon our lives every single day.
DAY 18
The thing that I realize on a regular basis is that there is power in praise. Today I was reading through Psalm 23 " 1 The LORD is my shepherd;
I shall not want.
2 He makes me to lie down in green pastures;
He leads me beside the still waters.
3 He restores my soul;
He leads me in the paths of righteousness
For His name’s sake.
4 Yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death,
I will fear no evil;
For You are with me;
Your rod and Your staff, they comfort me.
5 You prepare a table before me in the presence of my enemies;
You anoint my head with oil;
My cup runs over.
6 Surely goodness and mercy shall follow me
All the days of my life;
And I will dwell[a] in the house of the LORD
Forever."
When I closed my eyes and thought about how true it has been in my life and just praised God for being such a wonderful and faithful God to me I just felt his presence in a strong way. When I count his blessings in my life nothing lying in front of me intimidates me anymore , God was able to do amazing things in my life and he is still able to provide no matter what the situation is.
DAY 19
Today I was wondering whether God really hears my prayer. I sometimes manage to live exactly opposite of how he desires me to live. I wondered if God would still be faithful to an unfaithful person like me . When I was reading 2 Corinthians 5:21 "He made Him who knew no sin to be sin for me, that I may become the righteousness of God" God made me realize how all his ways and thoughts are opposite to the world's ways. Like Jesus said, the least shall be the greatest, the humble shall inherit his kingdom, likewise he made a provision for sinners like us to be declared righteous through his son. So I realize its not about me , but about him , its not by my works but by his grace that God hears my prayers and answers me.
DAY 20
Today in our group prayer time we were looking at Acts 9:17-18 "17 pAnd Ananias went his way and entered the house; and qlaying his hands on him he said, “Brother Saul, the Lord 4Jesus, who appeared to you on the road as you came, has sent me that you may receive your sight and rbe filled with the Holy Spirit.” 18Immediately there fell from his eyes something like scales, and he received his sight at once; and he arose and was baptized." I started thinking about Saul's life before getting converted and his life after. I notice how there was a 180degree change in his ways and how, from being really zealous about punishing Christians , he turned into a really zealous Christian. When I think about my life, I have known the truth of Christ for ages but still haven't let go of some of my old habits. My prayer to God was to transform my life completely from loving the world to loving things of God.
DAY 21
Today the verse that really stuck to me when I was praying was Psalm 145:8-9 "The Lord is gracious and full of compassion, slow to anger and great in mercy. The Lord is good to all, and His tender mercies are over all His works" How true that has been in my life. Despite of my reckless lifestyle the Lord has been so good to me. He is really slow to anger and longsuffering. When I compare Gods character to ours there is such a difference. When we love someone as much as God loves us, what would be our reaction if they are unfaithful and disobedient to us? Yet God is his infinite mercy graciously picks me up every time I fall and gives me a clean slate to try again.
DAY 22
Today being Good Friday I was meditating on God's sacrifice for us on the cross then I came across this verse from Micah "He has shown me what is good; and what does the Lord require of me but to do justly, to love mercy, and to walk humbly with my God (Micah 6:8)" How true it is, God gave his life for us on the cross and expects nothing in return. We don't have to earn salvation we don't have to do anything in return , the only things he expects of us is to walk humbly with Him. It makes me praise Him when I think about how free his sacrifice has set me.
DAY 23
I was reading through Isaiah 64:8 "But now, O Lord , You are our Father; we are the clay, and You are our potter; and all we are the work of Your hand" and it really inspired me. It is such a burden lifted off my shoulders when I commit my ways to him. When we make our own decisions in life it is always a risk, for we cannot speculate the outcome. But if we let him have his will in our lives , when know we can never go wrong. So "I commit my way to the Lord, and trust also in Him, and He shall bring it to pass.... I rest in the Lord and wait patiently for Him (Psalm 37:5,7)"
DAY 24
Today I was reading Mathew 5:3-10 "
3 Blessed are the poor in spirit, For theirs is the kingdom of heaven.
4 Blessed are those who mourn,
For they shall be comforted.
5 Blessed are the meek,
For they shall inherit the earth.
6 Blessed are those who hunger and thirst for righteousness,
For they shall be filled.
7 Blessed are the merciful,
For they shall obtain mercy.
8 Blessed are the pure in heart,
For they shall see God.
9 Blessed are the peacemakers,
For they shall be called sons of God.
10 Blessed are those who are persecuted for righteousness’ sake,
For theirs is the kingdom of heaven. "
And the challenge was to ask God to show which of these attitudes I need the most. And God was convicting me of the verse "6 Blessed are those who hunger and thirst for righteousness, For they shall be filled. " and I was thinking how often I struggle with that fact. What a blessed attitude that will be, to hunger and thirst after righteousness. For God demands us to be holy like he is holy and to love righteousness and to hate evil. So today I pray for God to give me a zealous passion and love for seeking righteousness in my life.
DAY 25
I was reading Roman 5:6-8 as a part of my scripture study today and how true it is . "For when we were still without strength, in due time Christ died for the ungodly. For scarcely for a righteous man will one die; yet perhaps for a good man someone would even dare to die. But God demonstrated his own love towards us, in that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us." It sometimes makes me wonder why God even cares about someone like me or why he chose to reveal his truth to a sinner like me. But his ways are greater than my ways and his thoughts much greater than mine. So only thing I have to do is thank him for his amazing love. What a blessed privilege towards an undeserving person like me.
DAY 26
Today I was kind of concerned about my job situation and job trials and other worries when I started to pray and I could not really think or pray about much else. Then I read Luke 10:41-42 "You are worried and troubled about many things. But one thing is needed .. " Through this God convicted me to seek him first in my life and he will take care of the rest. It is important for us to seek God and think about higher things than the mundane things in our lives. If my relationship with God is right, he being my heavenly father will provide for all my needs. Mathew 6:33-34 "I will seek first the kingdom of God.. I will not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about its own things. Sufficient for the day is its own trouble."
DAY 27
As I was praying with my small group today God turned my attention to a passage we were reading in
Deuteronomy 6 " Now this is the commandment,and these are the statutes and judgments which the LORD your God has commanded to teach you, that you may observe them in the land which you are crossing over to possess, 2 that you may fear the LORD your God, to keep all His statutes and His commandments which I command you, you and your son and your grandson, all the days of your life, and that your days may be prolonged. 3Therefore hear, O Israel, and be careful to observe it, that it may be well with you, and that you may multiply greatly as the LORD God of your fathers has promised you—‘a land flowing with milk and honey.’4 “Hear, O Israel: The LORD our God, the LORD is one! 5 You shall love the LORD your God with all your heart, with all your soul, and with all your strength. "
I always skimmed through the passage and never really understood what God meant by loving Him with all my heart. There are so many relationships in life I pursue with so many people and stop me from pursuing God or that take God's place in my life. God revealed to me that loving God with all my just doesn't mean putting him first in my life it also means not holding back things in my heart that go against his will and to not continue pursuing relationships that do not help me to draw closer to God but in fact will draw me away from him. I believe as Christians we have to guard our hearts or we will easily get deterred into longing after things that eventually will draw us away from God. The enemy is always at work trying to put something in our lives that will just keep us occupied otherwise, like relationships, jobs, money, sports and other passions.
DAY 28
When I think about God's goodness in my life I wonder how I would've done without him in some situations. Yet when I am really put under stress to make a decision quick, or when I am really anxious about something I never think about God's will in the matter, but tend to do my own thing which often results in a train wreck. When I read John 15:5 today "You are the vine, I am the branch. Apart from You I can do nothing " I thought how true it was in my life. My life's story would have been so completely different if it weren't for God's intervention in my life. I pray that God will teach me more to rely on him for every single thing in life and know what his Holy spirit in prompting me to do.
DAY 30
How often I forget to be humble and seek God with diligence. Usually my attitude towards prayer is that God should listen and forgive me ,its his responsibility, but I seldom do anything to seek him earnestly.
Psalm 25:4-9 " 4 Show me Your ways, O LORD;
Teach me Your paths.
5 Lead me in Your truth and teach me,
For You are the God of my salvation;
On You I wait all the day.
6 Remember, O LORD, Your tender mercies and Your loving kindnesses,
For they are from of old.
7 Do not remember the sins of my youth, nor my transgressions;
According to Your mercy remember me,
For Your goodness’ sake, O LORD.
8 Good and upright is the LORD;
Therefore He teaches sinners in the way.
9 The humble He guides in justice,
And the humble He teaches His way."
I realized that there is power in waiting in the Lord's presence, for the bible says "He who waits on the Lord shall mount up on wings like eagles." And there is power in humility. Like in Luke 18:13 " And the tax collector, standing afar off, would not so much as raise his eyes to heaven, but beat his breast, saying, ‘God, be merciful to me a sinner!’" God hears and answers prayers of the humble.
